SUBJECT: Corporate Vocab used to the survival in Bangalore IT industry (1/n)
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Hi All,
It has come to my notice that many of us are not using correct behavior while in corporate environment in Bangalore. Today I will plan to knowledge transfer some tips to help you plan for survive Bangalore IT industry by improving your vocab skills. Along with this mail, please find attached my very humblest and most sincerest apologies to Oxford and Webster dictionary. Let us plan to begin now, shall we?
Point 1: Always use the pointers:- In coding as well as communication, it is highly important to do pointers. Pointers helping managers to understand your situation and plan accordingly to make sure they are more help to yourself. However, no requirement is needed for any punctuations or quotes because that is too complicated and also remember to keep your sentence very long because very longer the sentence the greater the raise in the your next performance reviews.
Point 2: ALWAYS PLAN! :- If anything happens without plan, client as well as customer will be super unhappy. So always plan for everything. Point to be noted, you do not go for lunch, you PLAN for lunch. You do not attend a meeting, you plan for meeting. You must also very kindly plan to use washroom also. Plotting and planning are the best way to utilize company resources to maximum. There must always be a plan. If normal plan does not work out, ask Manager to plan differently. Also keep Tech Lead and other stake holders in CC.
Point 3: Thanks and Regards :- Always put your thanks and regards whether replying to mail or talking. For senior contacting, please to use both. For junior contacting, please to use only thanks because actually also you have zero regards for them. Then why to lie? Paapa Le.
Point 4: Understand the short form :- EOD does not mean "Egg on Dose" you hungry fellow, always thinking of eating aa? It means your boss shall be the angry if you don't finish work by Free Snacks time. PFA, ETA, ASAP, Vocab, Dev, PQA, TQA, HR, FIN, BU, STL, EPM, PM, SSE, SE, BCC, CC, BC, MC etc all should be on your fingertips just like nineteen one's aa tables. Unmisinterpretation of above short form will lead to escalations.
Point 5: Proper addressification required:- When addressifying one colleague, always start with question like - "What ra XYZ? So busy you are aa?". For example, "What ra Kumar? So busy you are aa? Daily sitting in cafeteria not coming to floor only. You must plan to start working on that project Boss has planned to assign to you, otherwise gone only." Addressify all by first name only. No Sir, no Madam.
Point 6: VERY IMPORTANT- Lightly pepper English with local lingo fillers. Add salt to taste. Words like ra, da, na, dei, lei, maga, macha, putta, Cheta, Anna, Chechi, Akkaw are totally acceptable even with the customer sitting in the foreign office. Also, like those Army fellows in the border movies use Over for walkies talkies na? You use ONLY. For example, "Hello da Mr. Johny Walker! What time it is in USA maga? My cousin lives in your same to same city only!"
It is my extremely strong belief that so much of knowledge transfer is enough for the today. Too much extra shall be a waste of effort and will have lower productivity. We shall plan to continue this after you review this, make High Level Design and come back with Detail Design and Functional Requirements for adding new features to this product.
Thanks and Regards,
Kumar
Lang Skill Qual Exec
PS: PS is not Play Station in your house, it is post script da. Remember OK na?
++ Baby Kutty for compliance verification.
Hi All,
It has come to my notice that many of us are not using correct behavior while in corporate environment in Bangalore. Today I will plan to knowledge transfer some tips to help you plan for survive Bangalore IT industry by improving your vocab skills. Along with this mail, please find attached my very humblest and most sincerest apologies to Oxford and Webster dictionary. Let us plan to begin now, shall we?
Point 1: Always use the pointers:- In coding as well as communication, it is highly important to do pointers. Pointers helping managers to understand your situation and plan accordingly to make sure they are more help to yourself. However, no requirement is needed for any punctuations or quotes because that is too complicated and also remember to keep your sentence very long because very longer the sentence the greater the raise in the your next performance reviews.
Point 2: ALWAYS PLAN! :- If anything happens without plan, client as well as customer will be super unhappy. So always plan for everything. Point to be noted, you do not go for lunch, you PLAN for lunch. You do not attend a meeting, you plan for meeting. You must also very kindly plan to use washroom also. Plotting and planning are the best way to utilize company resources to maximum. There must always be a plan. If normal plan does not work out, ask Manager to plan differently. Also keep Tech Lead and other stake holders in CC.
Point 3: Thanks and Regards :- Always put your thanks and regards whether replying to mail or talking. For senior contacting, please to use both. For junior contacting, please to use only thanks because actually also you have zero regards for them. Then why to lie? Paapa Le.
Point 4: Understand the short form :- EOD does not mean "Egg on Dose" you hungry fellow, always thinking of eating aa? It means your boss shall be the angry if you don't finish work by Free Snacks time. PFA, ETA, ASAP, Vocab, Dev, PQA, TQA, HR, FIN, BU, STL, EPM, PM, SSE, SE, BCC, CC, BC, MC etc all should be on your fingertips just like nineteen one's aa tables. Unmisinterpretation of above short form will lead to escalations.
Point 5: Proper addressification required:- When addressifying one colleague, always start with question like - "What ra XYZ? So busy you are aa?". For example, "What ra Kumar? So busy you are aa? Daily sitting in cafeteria not coming to floor only. You must plan to start working on that project Boss has planned to assign to you, otherwise gone only." Addressify all by first name only. No Sir, no Madam.
Point 6: VERY IMPORTANT- Lightly pepper English with local lingo fillers. Add salt to taste. Words like ra, da, na, dei, lei, maga, macha, putta, Cheta, Anna, Chechi, Akkaw are totally acceptable even with the customer sitting in the foreign office. Also, like those Army fellows in the border movies use Over for walkies talkies na? You use ONLY. For example, "Hello da Mr. Johny Walker! What time it is in USA maga? My cousin lives in your same to same city only!"
It is my extremely strong belief that so much of knowledge transfer is enough for the today. Too much extra shall be a waste of effort and will have lower productivity. We shall plan to continue this after you review this, make High Level Design and come back with Detail Design and Functional Requirements for adding new features to this product.
Thanks and Regards,
Kumar
Lang Skill Qual Exec
PS: PS is not Play Station in your house, it is post script da. Remember OK na?
